I'm sorry for always smells like cigarettes and laugh a little bit too loud. I didn't meant to stuttered every time you lullaby me with beautiful words. I'm sorry for not spending enough time with you when I had the chance. I'm sorry for cursing a lot when I'm with you. I'm sorry for not taking things serious even when you insist me too. I'm sorry for not missing you just like how you missed me. For not saying sweet words to you just like how you always said to me. I'm sorry for not understanding your love. I'm sorry for crying over the smallest thing in this world and blame it all on you. I'm sorry for not needing you like how you needed me. I'm sorry for not grooming myself every time we met. I'm sorry for not being a good girlfriend too. But even for all of the mistakes I've done to you, you never left my side.
On the night of my birthday, I waited in my new white dress for you to come but you never did. You said you would but you didn't. Why my love, have you getting tired of me? Is all my flaw cuts you just like how they cut me? I'm sorry. For the first time that night I groomed myself for someone but ended up disappointed. You left. They told me that you're going to be gone for awhile and you'll comeback once everything settles down. They lied. You didn't comeback and I'm positive that you never will.
Today I woke up with tears streaming down my face. Bids of sweats falling damping my fringe. My breath were uneven, my eyes were blurred by tears and my body was shaking. Why is this happening to me? Please stop it. I can't take it anymore. To see him walking away from me, leaving me all by myself in the middle of no where.
Maybe I deserve all of these.
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